A Season of Refinement

"Be yourself exactly before God when and present your problems-the things you have come to your wits end about. Ask what you will, and Jesus Christ says your prayers will be answered. We can always tell whether our will is in what we ask by the way we live when we are not praying."

Miki and I took some time today and went over this season of refinement. This is definitely the toughest season to date. After some hard decisions and prayer this past week, we took some time to go over what God has been doing in our lives, and what is coming along the horizon. You know what we found? We have absolutely no idea what is coming up! Yet, as we went through the things He has allowed us to experience, we cannot say that we are not in His Will. As I said to friend today, we are definitely in the fire of refinement.

I read in Oswald Chambers reflections that "prayer changes us, and we change things." I think this holds true for us in this particular season. Throughout the NT I see the ways that God desires us to change us from within in order that we do in His glory. We cannot do things without Him at the heart of it, which is what prayer does to connect us to Him in relationship. We end up not doing things for His glory and within our own framework of what we perceive as His glory.

I am afraid that we have more that we need to sacrifice in the days to come. I think that is the reality in the days ahead. It is not a bad thing, but one that we will have to rely on God to prepare us for. It begins with prayer. We don't know what this means, but we don't have to. We just rely on Him. It does not make it any easier, but there is a great hope in knowing that God is working on us for the future. This is definitely frustration yet peace in Him on a different level. Be with us O God, we bow before you with all that we are...

Back into the academics

It amazes me sometimes how much I am reading these days. I can remember when I didn't read a single book within a year, and now God has got me reading more than I can count. Funny how things change when you hand your life over to Christ...

In my theology class this past week, we had to recall our salvation story...I must admit it has been a long time. But it got me thinking, was I really saved back when I was 10 years old? I have asked myself this question many times, but this time it really was a challenge to think of it. I guess it was difficult because I cannot remember much when I was 10 years old. I know that the professor was not trying to put into question of my salvation, but it definitely got me to weigh if I truly handed over my life to Christ back then. And now I am assured that I did. I understand now more than ever that God took a hold of me as I child, bathing me in a joy that I know can only come from Him. Though I cannot fully understand it at 10, I can understand it today. I think my confusion of my salvation came from the fact that I had never experienced since then a complete joy and reliance in Him as I did back when I was a child. My rededication was such an emotive time and release of control that I had no other basis for it except when I had the faith of a child...whew!

But my story aside, God's change in people are such wonderful stories. THERE IS NEVER A BORING OR BAD STORY WHEN IT COMES TO BEING SAVED BY CHRIST. It is amazing to see the wonderful and perfect ways He affects change in those who surrender to Him.

Who would've thought the boy who stuck his fingers in the light socket again and again all those years ago could have such thoughts?! Praise God from whom all blessings flow....